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Wilderness & Wellbeing BLOG

My name is Tom Smallwood and here you will find my posts and those of guests, on the positive effects of time spent outdoors.

outdoors mental health anxiety nature

What if the outdoors is not the answer?

January 16, 2019

I struggle to enjoy myself. There, I said it. I know its mildly ridiculous but I find it hard to notice and appreciate a moment of happiness because my anxiety turns my mind to thoughts of doom and my feelings of guilt prevent me from truly enjoying myself.

I am sure I am not alone. But, this doesn't happen in the outdoors. I don’t know why.

If it is something I am doing when I am paddling or walking or just sitting under a tree listening to the sounds of the forest I might be able to translate it to my every day life… but what if it isn’t? It definitely isn’t. Ah, there I go again.

Positive to negative

I have always considered myself to be a positive person and it is only recently that my eyes have been opened to my overwhelming negativity. It is a peculiar feeling to think you are one thing and then realise you are another.

I have always craved the company of positive people and only now do I realise that it is because they lift me out of my natural state and not because they maintain it.

Now that I am beginning to understand this negativity and the anxiety it brings, as well as the unnecessary guilt I carry around with me, I am also beginning to combat it and look to find ways to enjoy the moment. So how does the outdoors fit into this?

Well, for some time now I have recognised that time spent in the wild, in nature (whether alone or in company) makes me feel better. I guess I wouldn’t be writing this blog otherwise. I also assumed that it made me better. Every time I go for a walk, exert myself outdoors or simply sit in contemplation of nature I feel much better, therefore it is the cure, right? Wrong.

Sorry Ben Fogle!

More recently it has also dawned on me that getting outside is a respite from my usual mental struggles. Through the physical effort, the beauty, the harshness or the calm of the natural world I get a welcome, but temporary, reprieve from the whirring and chattering of my mind. Outdoors I often fall asleep much quicker and I always (nearly always) find the relaxation I need to recharge a little.

But it is not enough. I don’t want to run away from my family to find peace and happiness and a new life in the wild. Sorry Ben Fogle, if you thought you had another episode in the bank. The outdoors feels like a complete mental breather, a total distraction, but in this sense it is no different to just switching the TV on to avoid thinking. Ok, it’s a lot healthier, but on this level it is a mechanism for coping and not a solution. It is an escape.

What if the outdoors is not the answer to my troubles but simply a break from them? I should be grateful anyway of course, but perhaps from now on I will pay more attention as to what changes when I tramp up a hill, sleep in a forest or sit by the river. What happens to me that makes me feel joy in the moment and discard my imagined woes and how can I bottle it?

I would love to hear your thoughts and how you use the outdoors for your own wellbeing. Comment below or get in touch

Tags Mental Health, Adventure
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